Lagniappe (aka Blog)

206-926-9848

Tips for managing high conflict divorce

Posted by Elise Buie | Apr 14, 2017 | 0 Comments

Writing

All communication, no matter how trivial, should be done in writing. Email is preferable to text because email is easily searchable and can be accessed from a variety of different devices.

Commit to your parenting plan

Follow the tenants of your parenting plan. Treat your parenting plan like a contract and abide by it to the letter and spirit. Do not make alterations except in emergent situations. One of the best ways to avoid conflict with an ex spouse it to steer clear of unpredictability in your interactions. In a situation with mutual respect and healthy communication, you may be able to ask your ex spouse to alter the schedule to accommodate an occasional calendar complication but it is best to treat your parenting plan like you would a job contract and plan your life accordingly when dealing with a high conflict ex.

 Do not involve the kids or other family members in your drama

Comments like “things would be easier if your mother wasn't so difficult” or “your father always gives me trouble” do absolutely nothing positive. They might be cathartic for you, but they are damaging to your kids and undermine any steps you've taken to have better communication with you ex.

Treat others the way you want to be treated, even if they don't deserve it

You cannot control other people's behavior but you are entirely in control of your reaction to this behavior. Being the bigger person or the more mature communicator can feel burdensome but it is good for your karma and sets a great example for your children. Behaving in a respectful, fair, and considerate manner is not something you will look back and regret, even if it does not advance your position with your ex. Though it's often hard to remember in the heat of the moment, expending negative energy towards someone is in no way less taxing on your psyche than being kind.  

About the Author

Elise Buie

Passionate, creative, problem-solving attorney who crafts solutions rather than obstacles. Elise spends significant time educating her clients on healthy communication skills. Elise also ensures that her clients make informed decisions by understanding the future emotional and financial implications of their decisions. Your family's future is our first priority. Elise teaches her clients new skills to empower them in the future as they adjust to the new family structure. While divorce ends a marriage, it is the beginning of your new, often times, more authentic life. Elise will help you begin that new life with new skills to handle any future challenges.

Comments

There are no comments for this post. Be the first and Add your Comment below.

Leave a Comment

Areas We Serve

At Elise Buie Family Law Group, PLLC, we represent clients from Seattle and Bellevue, Washington, and the surrounding region, including all of King County and the cities of Redmond, Kirkland, Bellevue, Edmonds, Issaquah, Kenmore, Kent, Federal Way, Shoreline, Des Moines, Bainbridge Island, Vashon, Auburn, Renton and Puyallup. We love working with clients from Seattle's unique, eclectic neighborhoods: West Seattle, Fremont, Ballard, Madrona, Queen Anne, Greenwood, Ravenna, Maple Leaf, Wedgewood, View Ridge, Laurelhurst, Windermere, Madison Park, Magnolia, South Lake Union, Capitol Hill, Broadmoor, Phinney Ridge, Crown Hill, Yarrow Point and Mercer Island.

Contact Us

Call us at (206) 926-9848
Email: info@elisebuiefamilylaw.com

We'll be happy to set up an initial consult. Thank you for looking around our site. We look forward to serving you.

We welcome your email, but please understand that if you are not already a client of Elise Buie Family Law Group, PLLC, we cannot represent you until we confirm that representing you would not create a conflict of interest. Please do not include any confidential information until we verify that our office is in a position to represent you and our engagement is confirmed in writing. Prior to that time, there is no legal representation and thus no attorney-client confidentiality.

Thank you.

Elise Buie Family Law Group

Jumping 20orca compressor

Elise Buie Family Law Group PLLC
1001 Fourth Avenue, 44th Floor   Seattle, WA 98154

Menu