Lagniappe (aka Blog)


Sacred Cows of Marriage and Divorce

Posted by Elise Buie | Aug 24, 2015 | 0 Comments

Google has been known to investigate some very strange areas. One couple who works for the company has decided to tackle the research on divorce and see if it really holds water. People throw around statistics about marriage and divorce all the time, but Astro Teller (yes, that's his name) says that many of the statistics are flawed.

In his new book, Sacred Cows: The Truth about Divorce and Marriage, he identifies seven “sacred cows” of marriage and divorce that can keep people trapped in a marriage that isn't healthy:

  • The Holy Cow: Marriage is always good and divorce is always bad.
  • The Expert Cow: All marital problems can be fixed with the right self-help book or marriage counselor.
  • The Selfish Cow: Everyone who gets divorced is selfish and everyone who stays married is selfless.
  • The Defective Cow: If you cannot make your marriage happy, or if you choose to divorce, you must be defective in some way.
  • The Innocent Victim Cow: Children's lives are ruined by divorce.
  • The One True Cow: Finding true love should be your highest goal in life unless you're married, in which case you should stop believing in love.
  • The Other Cow: Nobody should be allowed to leave a marriage in order to be with a new partner.

In his final analysis, we don't have enough hard scientific data to prove that any of these ideas about marriage and divorce are true. Instead, each partner and family unit has their own unique circumstances that must be taken into account, and society should take that into account instead of jumping to one of the sacred cows.

Do you agree or disagree? We will reserve judgment, at least until we read the book more thoroughly, but if you would like some recommend resources we have for marriages and divorces, we have a booklist on our website. You can find out more at this link.

Do you need divorce advice? Contact Elise Buie Family Law Group, PLLC for a free and confidential consultation.

About the Author

Elise Buie

Passionate, creative, problem-solving attorney who crafts solutions rather than obstacles. Elise spends significant time educating her clients on healthy communication skills. Elise also ensures that her clients make informed decisions by understanding the future emotional and financial implications of their decisions. Your family's future is our first priority. Elise teaches her clients new skills to empower them in the future as they adjust to the new family structure. While divorce ends a marriage, it is the beginning of your new, often times, more authentic life. Elise will help you begin that new life with new skills to handle any future challenges.


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Elise Buie Family Law Group PLLC
1001 Fourth Avenue, 44th Floor   Seattle, WA 98154